Kata guru agama dan sejarah saya dulu: Islam masuk ke hati umatnya, termasuk di Indonesia, dengan cara yang lembut. But then, di Indonesia sekarang ini banyak orang Islam yang berusaha menjalankan Islam dengan begitu kerasnya, sekeras batu, bahkan sampai melukai hati umat agama lain. Dan mereka menuntut umat lain untuk toleransi HANYA pada umat Islam? Tuh orang pada bego apa gimana? Kalo mau keras-kerasan ego, ga usah bawa-bawa agama lah. Banci.
Disclaimer: This post contains some spoilers.
This week I've finished an amazing book titled The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas. The story was about Starr Carter, a sixteen year-old Afro girl who witnessed the dead of Khalil, her bestfriend. Khalil was shot by a cop who claimed to feel threatened by his movement when the cops stopped his car and checked on him, as well as Starr, who was with him that night.
Starr who attended 'white' school had always covered up her living in 'black' neighborhood, afraid if her friends would see her 'ghetto' life. That was why she did not tell any of her bestfriends in school about Khalil's dead, not even Chris - her white boyfriend. She became more sensitive as Hailey, her friend at school, threw a racist stuff on her. She was cranky but still got no courage to tell what really happened that night. Until Ms. Ofrah came and encouraged her to speak.
This book was great. Since I follow 'Now This Is News' instagram, I sort of understand about how racism in US has caused an assumptions leading to the death of innocent lives. Young Afros were killed just because they seemed to be threatening, even though they got no weapon and no evil intention at all. The cops rationalised the killing on the assumption that they were thugs or drug dealers. They forget that they were just the unarmed kids. They forget that they might have family, friend, life, and dreams. To me, this book bolds that message.
Besides racism things, there are a lot of moral values from this book. It encourages those who are oppressed to stay brave and do the right thing because even the bravest man would feel scared, but he overcomes it. I love the Carters because they are always have each other's back, that is how a family should be. The parents were great, they give their kids better shelter and education even when it requires much more hard work for them. That everyone deserves a second chance and they better not mess it up. That mom would be a mom, even when she chooses the tough way or her kids hate her. And to those teenagers, when your friend is being an asshole, you should think about it and reconsider if she is worth to be kept or not.
PS. It reminds me of a maid once worked in my parents' house. She and her husband were only graduated from elementary school, but she works real hard to make sure that her kids will get a better and higher education. I remember how she cries to me after get off on her oldest who told her he did not want to go to school and want to work instead. She told her kid that she did not need any money from him and she could still support him. I also remembers when she was mad at her second son who was with a bunch of kids using drugs. She really struggles to make her kids grow better when she lives in a poor neighborhood. I wish those kids would eventually understand her.
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Taken from here |
This week I've finished an amazing book titled The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas. The story was about Starr Carter, a sixteen year-old Afro girl who witnessed the dead of Khalil, her bestfriend. Khalil was shot by a cop who claimed to feel threatened by his movement when the cops stopped his car and checked on him, as well as Starr, who was with him that night.
Starr who attended 'white' school had always covered up her living in 'black' neighborhood, afraid if her friends would see her 'ghetto' life. That was why she did not tell any of her bestfriends in school about Khalil's dead, not even Chris - her white boyfriend. She became more sensitive as Hailey, her friend at school, threw a racist stuff on her. She was cranky but still got no courage to tell what really happened that night. Until Ms. Ofrah came and encouraged her to speak.
"Your voice is your weapon," - Ms. Ofrah.
This book was great. Since I follow 'Now This Is News' instagram, I sort of understand about how racism in US has caused an assumptions leading to the death of innocent lives. Young Afros were killed just because they seemed to be threatening, even though they got no weapon and no evil intention at all. The cops rationalised the killing on the assumption that they were thugs or drug dealers. They forget that they were just the unarmed kids. They forget that they might have family, friend, life, and dreams. To me, this book bolds that message.
Besides racism things, there are a lot of moral values from this book. It encourages those who are oppressed to stay brave and do the right thing because even the bravest man would feel scared, but he overcomes it. I love the Carters because they are always have each other's back, that is how a family should be. The parents were great, they give their kids better shelter and education even when it requires much more hard work for them. That everyone deserves a second chance and they better not mess it up. That mom would be a mom, even when she chooses the tough way or her kids hate her. And to those teenagers, when your friend is being an asshole, you should think about it and reconsider if she is worth to be kept or not.
PS. It reminds me of a maid once worked in my parents' house. She and her husband were only graduated from elementary school, but she works real hard to make sure that her kids will get a better and higher education. I remember how she cries to me after get off on her oldest who told her he did not want to go to school and want to work instead. She told her kid that she did not need any money from him and she could still support him. I also remembers when she was mad at her second son who was with a bunch of kids using drugs. She really struggles to make her kids grow better when she lives in a poor neighborhood. I wish those kids would eventually understand her.
Hello!
Bulan ini kami mulai masuk kegiatan kuliah departemen (baca: kuliah psikiatri all day long dan jaga tandem). Seru sih! Diri saya yang enam tahun lalu mungkin nggak akan menyangka. Jadi inget masa-masa koas ketika kami harus wawancara pasien di IGD, bangsal, poli, bahkan saat ujian (di depan konsulen). Juga masa-masa internsip dimana saya sering bersinggungan dengan kasus psikiatri (karena GP nya ngga mau buang waktu buat wawancara).
Ada yang menarik dari hal ini: saya merasa super kagok ketika wawancara pasien, meskipun sekedar role-play. Padahal, selama saya koas dan internsip saya merasa cukup luwes melakukan hal itu. Dan kenapa sekarang jadi kayak gini???
Beberapa hari yang lalu, saya kebagian role-play sama senior yang berakting sulit diajak wawancara karena ngga mau ngomong. Sungguhan deh, saya bingung mesti nanya mulai dari mana, kayak nyari cara A, B, C, tapi somehow masih kesulitan. Bahkan cenderung defensif, padahal sebagai terapis itu ngga boleh banget karena akan sulit menjalin rapport.
Kemudian, semalam ketika jaga tandem (jaga pertama dalam 21 bulan terakhir) saya coba untuk wawancara pasien. Dan di luar dugaan saya, dia ngga berhenti ngomong, sulit banget untuk dipotong. Saya sampai rasanya terseret kebawa arus, bahkan untuk mengakhiri wawancara aja saya kesulitan setengah mati sampe pengin nangis. Untung saya diselamatkan oleh senior yang ngajakin untuk makan :') terharu sungguh.
Pelajaran berharga dari pengalaman ini adalah "Jangan belagu dulu kalo bisa wawancara pasien, mungkin emang pasiennya yang mudah diajak bicara. Tapi jangan putus asa dulu kalo ga bisa wawancara karena bisa jadi pasiennya emang sulit diwawancara," kata guru saya. Saya juga sempet sharing dengan senior yang saya rasa udah jago wawancaranya. Simtomnya dapet, bisa ngarahin pasien, pokoknya in control. Tapiii, dia pun bilang kalau pas pertama kali wawancara, dia juga merasakan kesulitan yang sama. "Ngga nyangka kalo ternyata wawancara tuh ternyata susaaaah," gitu kalo bisa saya kutip. Yang namanya jam terbang itu perlu, maka kita perlu sering-sering latihan.
Sebagai orang pencemas dan agak menghindar, tentu aja kayak gini bikin saya cukup tegang. Tapi karena saya suka dan saya pengin improve, saya jadi tertantang untuk terus berlatih supaya bisa makin baik dari hari ke hari hingga empat tahun nanti. Kalo kata KPS, "Kalo kamu masuk ke sini artinya kamu harus siap untuk dihancurkan 'shell' nya." Wish me luck, semoga istiqomah untuk rajin belajar dan berlatih ❤
Bulan ini kami mulai masuk kegiatan kuliah departemen (baca: kuliah psikiatri all day long dan jaga tandem). Seru sih! Diri saya yang enam tahun lalu mungkin nggak akan menyangka. Jadi inget masa-masa koas ketika kami harus wawancara pasien di IGD, bangsal, poli, bahkan saat ujian (di depan konsulen). Juga masa-masa internsip dimana saya sering bersinggungan dengan kasus psikiatri (karena GP nya ngga mau buang waktu buat wawancara).
Ada yang menarik dari hal ini: saya merasa super kagok ketika wawancara pasien, meskipun sekedar role-play. Padahal, selama saya koas dan internsip saya merasa cukup luwes melakukan hal itu. Dan kenapa sekarang jadi kayak gini???
Beberapa hari yang lalu, saya kebagian role-play sama senior yang berakting sulit diajak wawancara karena ngga mau ngomong. Sungguhan deh, saya bingung mesti nanya mulai dari mana, kayak nyari cara A, B, C, tapi somehow masih kesulitan. Bahkan cenderung defensif, padahal sebagai terapis itu ngga boleh banget karena akan sulit menjalin rapport.
Kemudian, semalam ketika jaga tandem (jaga pertama dalam 21 bulan terakhir) saya coba untuk wawancara pasien. Dan di luar dugaan saya, dia ngga berhenti ngomong, sulit banget untuk dipotong. Saya sampai rasanya terseret kebawa arus, bahkan untuk mengakhiri wawancara aja saya kesulitan setengah mati sampe pengin nangis. Untung saya diselamatkan oleh senior yang ngajakin untuk makan :') terharu sungguh.
Pelajaran berharga dari pengalaman ini adalah "Jangan belagu dulu kalo bisa wawancara pasien, mungkin emang pasiennya yang mudah diajak bicara. Tapi jangan putus asa dulu kalo ga bisa wawancara karena bisa jadi pasiennya emang sulit diwawancara," kata guru saya. Saya juga sempet sharing dengan senior yang saya rasa udah jago wawancaranya. Simtomnya dapet, bisa ngarahin pasien, pokoknya in control. Tapiii, dia pun bilang kalau pas pertama kali wawancara, dia juga merasakan kesulitan yang sama. "Ngga nyangka kalo ternyata wawancara tuh ternyata susaaaah," gitu kalo bisa saya kutip. Yang namanya jam terbang itu perlu, maka kita perlu sering-sering latihan.
Sebagai orang pencemas dan agak menghindar, tentu aja kayak gini bikin saya cukup tegang. Tapi karena saya suka dan saya pengin improve, saya jadi tertantang untuk terus berlatih supaya bisa makin baik dari hari ke hari hingga empat tahun nanti. Kalo kata KPS, "Kalo kamu masuk ke sini artinya kamu harus siap untuk dihancurkan 'shell' nya." Wish me luck, semoga istiqomah untuk rajin belajar dan berlatih ❤
I can't say that I'm a fan of classical music. I am not that classy. Even so, I quite enjoy them. My first experience with classics was when I was in the tenth grade. I watched an anime titled 'La Corda d'Oro'. It means gold string in English. It tells about a girl who was gifted with a musical talent by a fairy to compete in classical concours. From that anime, I knew Minuet, Ave Maria, Chopin, Tchaikovsky, and so on.
My second experience was when I watched Prague City Philharmonic concert in Kumamoto City Hall almost eleven years ago. I watched it with Kumiko-San, Otosan, and Amirah - my roommate. The third time was when I attended Wibi Soerjadi's piano recital in Semarang. And the last one were when I attended Jakarta City Philharmonic (JCP) concert here in Jakarta.
I can listen to instrumental music, but I don't always get the classical music. Sometimes I can listen to it without getting bored, but most of the time I can't help but yawn. I agree that it is a best company for study, but only if it were in a class full of students, just like the time in the extra class I took when preparing for undergraduate study.
I knew JCP from a friend and was very curious to watch its concert. Finally, on August, we managed to watch it as a gift from my husband in our first anniversary. The theme was 'Space and Time' and the pieces picked were described a moment where each piece was arranged by the composer. And at that very time, I see what I was listening.
The first piece was Petite Symphonie for Nine Wind Instruments by Gounod. It was a piece composed during the 'beautiful era' before the World War I broke out. To me, it was light and cheerful. It was like seeing beautiful multi-color flowers in the garden where women wear old gown and men with their old-school suit. Some of them wear hat and some others bring umbrella. Some are talking, some are selling breads, and some are buying. Some men sit with newspaper in their hands, some with cigarette. It seems that there is nothing to worry about.
The second piece was Double Concerto for Two String Orchestras, Piano, and Timpani by Martinu. The timpani made my heart beats faster during this performance. I could feel myself panicking as the army is approaching and my surrounding is bombarded. The music was so tense that I could hear the screams, shots, and explosions in the atmosphere. It felt like I can see people dying around me. Both I and my husband even gasping for air when this piece ended. We just stared at the empty stage and then looked at each other when it was the time for intermission. Too amazed.
The next piece was L'Holorge de Flore (A Musical Flower Clock) by Francaix. It was consisted of seven parts. Each part described a time in a day when each flower blooms. This too makes me experienced a musical vision where flowers process to bloom, one-by-one.
The last one was Insidious by Misael Elahrens Tambuwun which combine orchestra and electronic tape as it is composed in this present digital era. Insidious tells a story of a child who was dragged by his nightmares he had in his sleep to mortality. It was creepy I know and I got goosebumps when Misael sang a part of 'Lingsir Wengi' song.
I was very satisfied watching this concert because finally I get what the pieces were all about. I just knew that we can 'see' classical music! Just like when we listen to other music or when we read books. The setlist and mini-lecture before the concert was started were vital. And I can see why I didn't get it in the first concert and the recital before. While the recital before didn't provide a setlist, the first concert gave a setlist in Nihongo or Japanese. That was why I didn't get it and even fell asleep 😅
Other than that, every movement of the conductor was meaningful to me. He moved to create the music, yet it seemed like he danced to the music too. When he went slow, so did the music, when he went tense, so did it, when he seemed to fly up on sky, the music brought us too.
Last week we watched another concert by JCP, but they played Indonesian songs, instead of classics. But that too was great. I loved it more because there were these superb singers with their angelic voices. Can't wait for more experience with JCP next year!
PS. One of my bucket-list is checked!
My second experience was when I watched Prague City Philharmonic concert in Kumamoto City Hall almost eleven years ago. I watched it with Kumiko-San, Otosan, and Amirah - my roommate. The third time was when I attended Wibi Soerjadi's piano recital in Semarang. And the last one were when I attended Jakarta City Philharmonic (JCP) concert here in Jakarta.
I can listen to instrumental music, but I don't always get the classical music. Sometimes I can listen to it without getting bored, but most of the time I can't help but yawn. I agree that it is a best company for study, but only if it were in a class full of students, just like the time in the extra class I took when preparing for undergraduate study.
I knew JCP from a friend and was very curious to watch its concert. Finally, on August, we managed to watch it as a gift from my husband in our first anniversary. The theme was 'Space and Time' and the pieces picked were described a moment where each piece was arranged by the composer. And at that very time, I see what I was listening.
The first piece was Petite Symphonie for Nine Wind Instruments by Gounod. It was a piece composed during the 'beautiful era' before the World War I broke out. To me, it was light and cheerful. It was like seeing beautiful multi-color flowers in the garden where women wear old gown and men with their old-school suit. Some of them wear hat and some others bring umbrella. Some are talking, some are selling breads, and some are buying. Some men sit with newspaper in their hands, some with cigarette. It seems that there is nothing to worry about.
The second piece was Double Concerto for Two String Orchestras, Piano, and Timpani by Martinu. The timpani made my heart beats faster during this performance. I could feel myself panicking as the army is approaching and my surrounding is bombarded. The music was so tense that I could hear the screams, shots, and explosions in the atmosphere. It felt like I can see people dying around me. Both I and my husband even gasping for air when this piece ended. We just stared at the empty stage and then looked at each other when it was the time for intermission. Too amazed.
The next piece was L'Holorge de Flore (A Musical Flower Clock) by Francaix. It was consisted of seven parts. Each part described a time in a day when each flower blooms. This too makes me experienced a musical vision where flowers process to bloom, one-by-one.
The last one was Insidious by Misael Elahrens Tambuwun which combine orchestra and electronic tape as it is composed in this present digital era. Insidious tells a story of a child who was dragged by his nightmares he had in his sleep to mortality. It was creepy I know and I got goosebumps when Misael sang a part of 'Lingsir Wengi' song.
I was very satisfied watching this concert because finally I get what the pieces were all about. I just knew that we can 'see' classical music! Just like when we listen to other music or when we read books. The setlist and mini-lecture before the concert was started were vital. And I can see why I didn't get it in the first concert and the recital before. While the recital before didn't provide a setlist, the first concert gave a setlist in Nihongo or Japanese. That was why I didn't get it and even fell asleep 😅
Other than that, every movement of the conductor was meaningful to me. He moved to create the music, yet it seemed like he danced to the music too. When he went slow, so did the music, when he went tense, so did it, when he seemed to fly up on sky, the music brought us too.
Last week we watched another concert by JCP, but they played Indonesian songs, instead of classics. But that too was great. I loved it more because there were these superb singers with their angelic voices. Can't wait for more experience with JCP next year!
PS. One of my bucket-list is checked!
Papa, di ingatan masa kecil saya adalah sosok yang penyayang. Papa yang selalu jadi transporter. Gendong saya yang ketiduran di mobil, ke kamar. Papa selalu ajak saya duduk di pangkuannya, bahkan ketika nyetir. Rasanya seperti baru kemarin. Papa selalu antar jemput saya ke sekolah tiap hari Sabtu, ngobrol dengan satpam atau sopir antar jemput di depan gerbang sekolah. Karena papa, saya jadi belajar mengenal arah mata angin. Papa selalu bilang, "Saya tunggu di sebelah timurnya sekolah ya," atau "Saya ada di sebelah barat, dekat rumah sakit."
Di ingatan masa remaja saya, papa adalah sosok pemarah yang menyeramkan. Hampir setiap minggu saya menangis karena gesekan-gesekan kecil dengan papa. Nggak terhitung berapa kali kami beradu mulut yang berujung saya menangis sambil kabur ke kamar dan membanting pintu. Diikuti papa dan ibu yang menggedor, menggebrak, dan mendobrak pintu kamar saya. Dan rentetan omelan mengalir dan membanjir, membuat saya terisak tanpa bisa berhenti. Papa sering hendak memukul ketika saya menjadi kurang ajar. Tapi entah karena papa yang nggak tegaan atau karena saya yang cukup gesit untuk berkelit sehingga hal itu hampir tidak pernah terjadi.
Ketika beranjak dewasa, saya mulai bisa melihat sisi lain dari papa. Papa adalah orang yang bijak dan sangat menginspirasi saya dalam berkarir, berkeluarga, dan bersosialisasi dengan tetangga. Cerita-cerita yang mengisi perjalanan saat berkendara memperlihatkan sosok papa yang sesungguhnya. Papa selalu memberi petuah di saat yang tidak terduga. Ia mengajarkan untuk loyal dalam bekerja, untuk tidak berbuat curang, untuk tidak pernah terlambat datang ke kantor, untuk terus belajar, untuk tetap rendah hati dan menjalin silaturahmi dengan pekerja lainnya, untuk tetap memprioritaskan keluarga, untuk meluangkan waktu bersosialisasi dengan tetangga.
Papa memang bukan bos besar atau seorang workaholic. Namun saya tau pasti, papa adalah sosok yang berintegritas tinggi, seorang ahli. Papa nggak pernah absen untuk mengunjungi keluarga atau tetangga yang terkena musibah. Sejauh apapun ia berada, ia selalu berupaya untuk datang. Keluarga dan tetangga bukanlah hal remeh temeh baginya. "Tetangga adalah keluarga terdekat kita," itu prinsip yang selalu ditanamkan agar kita selalu menghormati dan menjaga tetangga kita.
Papa membuka wawasan saya tentang dunia orang dewasa melalui masalah ekonomi, sosial, dan politik. Lagu-lagu favorit papa adalah yang terbaik. Saya masih mendengarkannya hingga hari ini. Papa yang menularkan pada saya kebiasaan cuci tangan sebelum dan sesudah makan, menggunakan sendok dan garpu saat makan, dan menggunakan sumpit saat makan mi. Papa adalah peri baik hati yang membolehkan saya membeli lebih dari dua buku di Gram*dia karena papa akan beli buku lebih banyak lagi. Papa yang memaksa saya untuk belajar mengaji, berenang, dan main musik. Tiga hal yang awalnya tidak saya sukai, tapi kini saya nikmati dan rasakan manfaatnya. Kami sama-sama suka bermain puzzle, entah puzzle bergambar, teka-teki silang atau sudoku. Dan ternyata kesukaan saya menulis pun diwariskan oleh papa!
Terlalu banyak hal menarik tentang sosok pria nomor satu di hidup saya itu. Namun setidaknya post ini cukup merangkum bahwa papa lebih dari sangat layak untuk diberikan ucapan "Selamat hari ayah," semoga papa sehat selalu dan bahagia selalu 💖
Di ingatan masa remaja saya, papa adalah sosok pemarah yang menyeramkan. Hampir setiap minggu saya menangis karena gesekan-gesekan kecil dengan papa. Nggak terhitung berapa kali kami beradu mulut yang berujung saya menangis sambil kabur ke kamar dan membanting pintu. Diikuti papa dan ibu yang menggedor, menggebrak, dan mendobrak pintu kamar saya. Dan rentetan omelan mengalir dan membanjir, membuat saya terisak tanpa bisa berhenti. Papa sering hendak memukul ketika saya menjadi kurang ajar. Tapi entah karena papa yang nggak tegaan atau karena saya yang cukup gesit untuk berkelit sehingga hal itu hampir tidak pernah terjadi.
Ketika beranjak dewasa, saya mulai bisa melihat sisi lain dari papa. Papa adalah orang yang bijak dan sangat menginspirasi saya dalam berkarir, berkeluarga, dan bersosialisasi dengan tetangga. Cerita-cerita yang mengisi perjalanan saat berkendara memperlihatkan sosok papa yang sesungguhnya. Papa selalu memberi petuah di saat yang tidak terduga. Ia mengajarkan untuk loyal dalam bekerja, untuk tidak berbuat curang, untuk tidak pernah terlambat datang ke kantor, untuk terus belajar, untuk tetap rendah hati dan menjalin silaturahmi dengan pekerja lainnya, untuk tetap memprioritaskan keluarga, untuk meluangkan waktu bersosialisasi dengan tetangga.
Papa memang bukan bos besar atau seorang workaholic. Namun saya tau pasti, papa adalah sosok yang berintegritas tinggi, seorang ahli. Papa nggak pernah absen untuk mengunjungi keluarga atau tetangga yang terkena musibah. Sejauh apapun ia berada, ia selalu berupaya untuk datang. Keluarga dan tetangga bukanlah hal remeh temeh baginya. "Tetangga adalah keluarga terdekat kita," itu prinsip yang selalu ditanamkan agar kita selalu menghormati dan menjaga tetangga kita.
Papa membuka wawasan saya tentang dunia orang dewasa melalui masalah ekonomi, sosial, dan politik. Lagu-lagu favorit papa adalah yang terbaik. Saya masih mendengarkannya hingga hari ini. Papa yang menularkan pada saya kebiasaan cuci tangan sebelum dan sesudah makan, menggunakan sendok dan garpu saat makan, dan menggunakan sumpit saat makan mi. Papa adalah peri baik hati yang membolehkan saya membeli lebih dari dua buku di Gram*dia karena papa akan beli buku lebih banyak lagi. Papa yang memaksa saya untuk belajar mengaji, berenang, dan main musik. Tiga hal yang awalnya tidak saya sukai, tapi kini saya nikmati dan rasakan manfaatnya. Kami sama-sama suka bermain puzzle, entah puzzle bergambar, teka-teki silang atau sudoku. Dan ternyata kesukaan saya menulis pun diwariskan oleh papa!
Terlalu banyak hal menarik tentang sosok pria nomor satu di hidup saya itu. Namun setidaknya post ini cukup merangkum bahwa papa lebih dari sangat layak untuk diberikan ucapan "Selamat hari ayah," semoga papa sehat selalu dan bahagia selalu 💖
I want to come home.
But, this is home.
But, it doesn't feel like one.
I want to drive.
Drive and drive away.
On this hazy day.
I miss my friends.
Who sang with me under the rain.
Who shared stories of a fantastic life.
I long for the old days.
Where everything seems easy.
And life is as it is.
But, this is home.
But, it doesn't feel like one.
I want to drive.
Drive and drive away.
On this hazy day.
I miss my friends.
Who sang with me under the rain.
Who shared stories of a fantastic life.
I long for the old days.
Where everything seems easy.
And life is as it is.
I want to be there, but I am not.
I am supposed to do this and that, but I don't.
All I do is wasting my time and overthinking,
instead of doing something.
I may regret this, I can feel it.
Why is it so hard just to move my body?
I am supposed to do this and that, but I don't.
All I do is wasting my time and overthinking,
instead of doing something.
I may regret this, I can feel it.
Why is it so hard just to move my body?